Why does my heart still want someone who is completely wrong for me?  Someone who does not treat me how I deserve?

Why does my heart still think he will change?  Why does it think he can change and be the type of man I want to be with?  

Why does my heart always seem to win in a battle versus my head?

Why is it still hard to ignore his text messages?

Why does my stomache turn to knots when I think about him with another girl?  Why do I still feel sucker punched when I see a girl flirting with him through facebook?

Why can’t I cut him out of my life? 

Why do we have to have mutual friends? 

Why does he need to be at every happy event surrounding my best friend’s wedding in the next two years?

Why can’t the last bit of me thats holding on, finally let go?

Why can’t this story be over?

Why can’t the lingering stop?

Why can’t I just be stronger?




Filed under Boys are Dumb, Honest to blog, My Crazy Thoughts, Relationships, The Ex

9 responses to “Why?

  1. Shehrazad

    A matter of time, girl.

  2. If you figure it out, can you let me know?

  3. I think it’s some kind of genetic flaw…one a man didn’t get. We’re too…forgiving…and want what we had because it WAS so good. And cutting the cord isn’t as easy for us for whatever reason. Hence the flaw.

  4. Tough questions with no easy answers…not even for a less-obsessive person. But for girls like you (and me), they can be torturous.

    I wish I could tell you it gets easier. Well, one thing does…take the time to get to know yourself. Truly valuing yourself helps you understand you really do deserve someone who values you, too!

    • Hello Little Miss Obsessive,
      I like what Kari (reply post #4) said at the very end of her second paragraph.

      “Truly valuing yourself helps you understand you really do deserve someone who values you, too!

      Life is about experiences, learning experiences. I’ve seen lots of people go through what you are going through right now. And I’ve dated women who time and time again put themselves in the same position.

      We all want to follow the heart, but the heart isn’t always the best one to listen to. You have to decide what it is you want in a mate, and what it is you don’t want, and make a list, check it twice (or more) and then you have make that tough decision…

      Through your experiences, and deciding what it is you don’t want, when a man treats you in that way, you have to decide it is time to walk away, and to look elsewhere. If you don’t, you will keep getting what you are getting.

      Don’t accept being treated any less than what you deserve, then and only then will find it, otherwise, you will be busy with the one you don’t deserve when the right one comes along, and the train will pass you by.

      You, and only you can make the decision as to whether or not you will accept being treated certain ways. If you don’t like it, you must change it, or it won’t change. This is tough advice to accept, and many can’t do it. Ask yourself what it is you really want, and go for it. Don’t accept what you don’t want. You can do it, but you must make that decision. Now go find Mr. Right! Leave Mr. Wrong to find someone else to abuse and hurt.

  5. brookem

    pondering whys such as this, drive me to drink, and eat far too much icecream. so instead, i say, don’t be so hard on yourself, follow your heart, and know taht everything will work out as it should.

  6. I believe every person has these thoughts about someone, it never really gets so easy but that makes you normal. All I can say is be patient, and do things you love with your close people to distract you. It can’t really erase the feeling but it helps you forget for a while.

  7. I get brookem’s point, wondering why men are like this will only make you feel more depressed.

    just be glad that you have the ability to feel and can use your experience to appreciate the next man who (hopefully) treats you right 🙂

  8. Same reason I thought to myself this week that it’s been a year since I was hurt by that one. I suppose it’s human nature.

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