Just Breathe…

Sometimes, I have to remind myself of this simple fact.  Sometimes, I let the little stresses of life consume me.  I feel my chest get tight and realize I am in fact barely breathing. 

I had the interview days at one of my top choices for grad school on Thursday and Friday of last week.  It went pretty well, I think.  I’m not the best at interviewing but I don’t think I completely bombed it.  I know I should feel relieved that the hard part is over.  And I do.  However, I also can’t kick the anxiety of analyzing everything I said and didn’t say during my SEVEN interviews over two days.   I should find out by the end of the week if I will be offered an internship/formal invitation to join the program so on the up side, at least I don’t have to torture myself for too much longer.

However, it has been frustrating me that I have been having such a hard time unwinding from the stress of the interview days.  I should feel satisfied that I accomplished what I set out to do – which was to try my very best.  I did that, and to be honest, I even surprised myself a little.  After the first interview, my nerves calmed down and the rest of the day seemed so much easier.  I guess the reason I feel like I’m bad at interviewing is that I get myself too worked up and then I can’t think straight.

Anyways, I guess I just felt like I couldn’t shut my mind off, even during my relaxing weekend.  All I could think about were the two days of interviews and learning about the program.  Obsessing.  I was definitely obsessing – and I wasn’t happy about it.  I just can’t seem to fully kick that annoying hint of anxiety and nervousness. 

I just keep trying to remind myself that it’s out of my hands.  I’ve done my part, I tried my hardest and now all I can do is hope for the best.  If I’m meant to go to this school it will work out.  If I don’t get in, it will be okay too.  And I just need to find peace in the fact that I went for it and did the best I could.

Inhale.  Exhale.

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4 Comments

Filed under Honest to blog, My Crazy, Over Analyzing, The Quarter Life Crisis

4 responses to “Just Breathe…

  1. In my workout DVDs, the guy is actually awesome about reminding us to breathe every now and then. It’s a good thing, because every time he does I realize I’ve forgotten to. Sigh.

  2. Wow, 7 interviews in 2 days? That would be stressful. I think you sum it up best when you said “And I just need to find peace in the fact that I went for it and did the best I could.” Thats all any one can ask of you and all that you ask of yourself.

  3. It’s hard not to obsess about that sort of thing. After all, so much of your conscious thought has gone into it beforehand, the brain doesn’t easily just “drop it” and move on to something else.

    Of course, that’s what beer is for. 😉

  4. this entire post reminds me of why you were/are one of my first bloggy BFFs. We are so alike. I do the same thing when it comes to thinking, worrying, obsessing. It’s just what I do. It’s so exhausting but it’s me.

    I can’t offer much advice since I know how it goes but cuddle up with the boy, or treat yourself to a hot chocolate and just relax as best you can. You did ALL you could and then some, of this I’m sure, so go with the flow and good things will come your way.

    xxoxo

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